Train 120 Health & Human Rights promoters in Kenya

Dear Friends and Partners

Our latest strategy to end FGM has been focused on men involvement. We have discovered that men blindly support FGM and more so keep hands off in an assumption that FGM is a woman’s issue. Men in Kisii often argue that it is the women who cut girls so, we should focus on women.  Our previous conversations with women reveal that women bear this painful act because the men have not agreed to end it. The men still prefer cut women as they believe that these women are more submissive and more “respectable.”  In our opinion respect here means women who cannot question men’s authority even when men do things which they should be held to account such as having extra marital affairs.

During our men’s trainings we discussed topics such as  human rights, domestic violence, the root causes of FGM, the health consequences of FGM, how FGM affects sexual and intimate relationships and sometimes lead to family break-ups, living with FGM survivors, and children’s rights to mention a few. A highly participatory training reaching over 53 men in one week confirmed to us that indeed men will listen and will end FGM if they can be well involved on what FGM really is. Those men who took this training made profound discoveries. As an example, here is what Mugendi, not his real name, said:

 “My name is Makori, a husband and father of two. There are things you have shared that are profoundly true in my own home. My wife has suffered in ways that are difficult to describe. Of course like many women in this village she went through the cut. I am shocked. I have understood why my wife went through excess pain during childbirth, her constant pain during intimacy, and so she is in constant painkillers. I thought I was going to lose her. We stopped at to children because of these challenges. She often complains of feeling pain inside her hips. Today I have understood her. Probably the pain emanated from people sitting on her during FGM causing some dislocations.  Probably the cut interfered with her genitalia. Hence she experienced excess pain and took long to heal after birth. I am so shocked. I cannot allow my daughter, cousin or any other person’s daughter to undergo FGM. You have impacted me with knowledge that I can use to bring change to our community.”

When we discussed gender based violence, the facilitator explained that rape, and even in marriage is a serious violence to a woman. Men laughed because they did not see how you can rape your wife. The facilitator explained what rape means. Isaac explained much to a big round of applause from the entire room that “She will never agree to it (meaning sex) unless I force her.” That almost all men agreed that that is how intimate life happens in their homes did not surprise us having heard these from the women.

What was so important is the discovery by men that “I did not know that FGM has a lot do to with what is going on in our bedrooms” said Isaac. In addition, men wanted to know how to deal with survivors of FGM. Thomas asked, “How can I make my wife share with me this issues you have shared.” To which our survivor facilitator responded that “yes, we can talk, we can have fulfilling sexual lives if only you as our husbands can be patient, gentle and supportive with the knowledge that a cut woman takes longer to get her sexual satisfaction.” Men continued to clap their hands and verbally made commitment to join the anti-FGM movement in Kisii community.

 Friends, you have been instrumental in empowering and protecting girls and women through supporting trainings like this one.  We appeal to you not to relent. Help us raise resources that will sustain the team in reaching out to more men in the community.

As Hope Foundation for African Women turned 5 years on 19^th December 2018, it was a milestone celebration for the Community Health and Human Rights Promoters (CHHRP). Sharing their five-years-journey’s achievements and challenges of their gender advocacy work to change attitudes, practises and behaviours towards ending Female genital mutilation and gender based violence.

Gladys Nyasuguta, one of the CHHRP’s and a survivor of FGM practise, besides gaining the boldness to share her story, conduct community outreaches, she has also gained the skills to facilitator the trainings. She is able to stand today as a co-facilitator to train men and women on anti-FGM/GBV, “Am so happy today that am standing before you, the esteemed men of our community, among you, my husband being present, for us to talk and discuss about FGM and GBV. I thank all of you for hearing and accepting our call. We thank you for the support you have shown us even though from a distance. But today, you presences here is a confirmation that we are ready to walk together to the path of ending FGM….”

Lydia Moranga “…When we talk of change in behaviour, attitude and practises, it begins with me and you. Myself, I was a cutter, before HFAW reached out to me. Cutting because I need to earn a living and support my family. But since I got trained and become part of CHHRP, I stopped cutting. I realised the effects of my action. And I discovered that I am much better now, through the economic empowerment project of HFAW. I DISCOVERED INNER PEACE KNOWING THAT AM NOT HURTING ANY SINGLE GIRL ANY MORE, INSTEAD, AM PROTECTING THEM FROM THE HURT. Am so happy to see all of you hear (referring to the 25 men being trained), my heart is strengthen. Who said that we will be able to meet all our needs by waiting to cut a little girl’s piece of body? There is nothing of economic gain that we get from cutting our daughters. To our husbands, hear me out!  It is total hurt. Let us stop, and stop it!”

Martha Mariaka “Since I was a young lady, I was very shy to stand before my mates and talk. I got married, had my children but still couldn’t even sit down to talk with them. Imagine, how could it be possible to stand before fellow women, men, young people and children to talk about anti-FGM/GBV, sexual reproductive health, human rights and economic empowerment? How? This questioning was overcame by HFAW 5 years ago when I was trained as one of CHHRP.  And today, we count at least 20 schools, 15000 students, 4000parents and 250 teachers that we have reached out with ant—FGM/GBV and number of girls that we have directly saved from planned FGM practise against them. Only 3 out of 7 men that were trained accompany us. Today am happy to know that 25 more men will be joining us in this journey…”

Your support dear friends, donors and partners, has made this possible. Has equipped the CHHRP with the knowledge and power they need to continue carrying on this work. With a total of 52 trained and equipped community health and human rights promoters now, the journey still continues.

FGM Zero Tolerance day, February 6^th is coming. Join us as CHHRP take to the streets and all corners of the Kisii community to advocate for zero tolerance of FGM.

Thank you so much for you continued support. We continue to appeal for your advice, financial and technical support. Please continue sharing HFAW’s work with your friends and family.

Thank you again for what you have done to promote this cause.

Sincerely and with gratitude