By Surendra Pariyar | Co-founder & Project Leader
Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy): A life of poverty, exclusion, exploitation and resilience
Single Woman(Name Changed for Privacy): 58 years old mother
Daughter 1: 15 years old daughter
Daughter 2: 13 years old daughter
Son: 10 years old son
Narrative:
Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) was born and raised in a remote village nestled in the heart of Dhading. Unwanted and the youngest daughter in a family of seven children Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy)’s childhood was marked by the harsh reality, that the poor and landless people in rural areas have to face. Her mother died when she was an infant and she grew up neglected, stunted and uncared for. Her father, a landless, hardworking farmer worked tirelessly as a day-labourer in the fields of others to provide for his large family, sacrificing his wellbeing to provide for their daily rice.
Education was out of question and Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) grew up illiterate, her world confined to the boundaries of their primitive dwelling. There was a lack of the most basic needs and comfort, constant food-insecurity, freezing cold in the winter and scorching heat in the summer, this was the harsh reality of her childhood. She remembers that there was no money for shampoo or for toothpaste or toothbrush and they brushed their teeth with roots and salt.
Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) never had a choice and when she was married off to a penniless day-labourer, she couldn’t object. Once married they lived the life of nomads. Homeless, they went wherever they found work, eating meager meals and sleeping rough.
When Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) became pregnant, they settled in one of the slums in the suburbs of Pokhara where the vicious cycle of poverty, hardship and misery seemed unending. In the following years Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) gave birth to two girls. For the poor working-class folks in Nepal, around 40% of the population, having daughters only and no male is considered a curse, and it is always the mother who is taking the blame. Eventually Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) would give birth to a son but by this time her husband had become increasingly frustrated and unhappy and he was easy prey to the demon of alcohol who completely devastated this man’s health and his ability to work. He was abusive and he exploited his wife and terrorized his children and Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) had to bear all the brunt once more in her life.
When her husband died after an excessive consumption of the popular homemade liquor “Raxi” the slum dwellers collected some money and he was cremated on the nearby river-banks. His was a miserable life and a miserable death and an example that his children are vowing not to follow.
Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) worked tirelessly and relentlessly to feed her children but ends never met and often they would go to sleep on an empty stomach. It was a life in misery and utter despair!
It was in this time of utter darkness and despair for Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) and her children that “BEF” conducted an awareness-program in the slum and she seized this golden opportunity to contact our social worker and she was encouraged to file an application.
Out of compassion for this family and our commitment to support and protect the most vulnerable from worst forms of abuse and exploitation we didn’t hesitate and we took this family under our wings with immediate effect.
Since the month of April “BEF” is providing a lifeline for Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) and her children, offering them the chance to break free from the vicious cycle of poverty and exclusion. Through our intervention, her children are now enrolled in school, provided with uniforms, shoes, and stationary, while basic necessities such as food and hygiene items are provided to ensure their well-being.
The transformation is nothing short of miraculous. Where once there was despair, there is now hope. Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy) 's children radiate with happiness, their laughter echoing through the corridors of their newfound security. For the first time in their lives, they can look to the future with hope and optimism, knowing that they are not alone in their uphill battle.
None of this would have been possible without the unwavering support of our partners and friends. Your generosity has not only changed the course of Single Woman (Name Changed for Privacy)’s life but has also given her children the chance to dream of a better tomorrow.
As we continue on this journey together, let us remember that it is the simplest and effective concept that is ours, that has the power to transform lives and bring light to the most desperate and helpless in Nepal.
It's simple; It’s simply B-E-F
Surendra, Raymond & TEAM
Bahini Educare Foundation
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